Embracing Love: A Journey Through a Humanist Wedding Ceremony: Legal, Personal and Unique

Introduction

Joyful moments captured with the newlyweds and their Humanist Celebrant, Sarah, sharing big smiles on their special day.

Hi there. As a humanist celebrant, I have the honour of guiding couples through one of the most significant moments of their lives. I'd like to share with you a glimpse into the beauty and meaning of a humanist wedding ceremony. Let me talk you through how you can make your Humanist Wedding ceremony as special as you are. We’ll look at some things that can bring your personality and values to the fore and make everyone feel included.

5-Minute Check-In

Before the ceremony begins and the magic unfolds, we ensure everything is in place with a quick five-minute check. It's essential to create a seamless and stress-free experience for the couple and their guests. At this point, I would ask your guests to turn their phones off or to silent. We would have discussed beforehand whether you want people taking photos or not and I would give these instructions now.

The Prelude

The ceremony begins with music that sets the tone for the day. As you make your entrance, all eyes turn to the couple, radiating love and joy. Think about your entrance- Do you want to walk in together, separately or escorted in by a loved one? Don’t be bound by tradition but don’t be afraid of it either. Do what feels right for you.

Think about the music as you enter. Choose something that is important to you and that adds meaning to your ceremony. Obviously in a Humanist Ceremony, the music will be non-religious.

Humanist Ceremony-Warm Welcomes and Introductions

A joyous couple stands with their Humanist Celebrant, Sarah, under a beautifully decorated arch by the sea, celebrating their special day.

I start with a heartfelt welcome, introducing myself and the significance of a humanist ceremony, which is rooted in values of love, respect, and equality. This is not just a union of two people but a celebration of their unique journey and love story. You might want to welcome someone who has made a special effort to get there or make a fuss of your granny. Don’t be shy! If you want to do it, do it! You might want to introduce your bridal party. It  may be fun to introduce your best man as the person who has been by your side since playschool, for example. All of this adds to the warmth of your ceremony.

A Moment of Remembrance

We may take a poignant moment to remember loved ones who are no longer with us. You might wish to light a remembrance candle to honour their presence and the impact they've had on your lives. Some couples set up small tables with photos of deceased loved ones and invite their guests to review the photos after the ceremony.

This may not be something you are comfortable with. Some couples just don’t want to change to tone of their celebration even if grief is not far away.

The Couple’s Story

In a cozy lakeside setting, a couple holds hands and exchanges vows, representing their dedication to each other.

One of the most touching parts of the wedding ceremony is recounting the couple's story—your journey, shared memories, and dreams for the future. It's a celebration of your unique bond and the experiences that have shaped your relationship. To me this is the very heart of the ceremony. It’s what brings everything else into context. You can add humour, romance and warmth here. You tell your story how you want it to be told.

Readings

Incorporating one or two readings adds a personal touch. It is a nice way to get friends and family members involved. It also adds another voice and richness to your ceremony. I always say, add a reading in if  it speaks to you or reflects your relationship. Don’t just put one in for the sake of it. When we meet, I can give you some ideas for readings, but you can pick a reading from anywhere. Readings in Humanist Ceremonies are non-religious and will always have a special weight for the couple.

Legal Declaration and Vows

The legal declaration and vows mark the official commitment. The vows are a profound promise to love and cherish each other. There are legal vows that must be spoken in a Humanist Wedding to meet the requirements of Irish law. The couple may also exchange personal vows, expressing their heartfelt emotions or making special commitments to one another.

Exchanging Rings and Declaration of Marriage

Rings are usually but not always exchanged. They symbolise the eternal nature of their love. After the ring exchange and vows, I  joyfully declare you as a married couple and invite you both to kiss to the applause and cheers of their loved ones. Some couples get very nervous about kissing in front of their loved ones. The best cure for that is practice!!

Signing the MRF

The newly married couple signs the Marriage Registration Form (MRF) to formalize their union. This often takes a little time, so it is a good place to play another tune. The music will also help you relax after what is often seen as the climax of the ceremony. You will be glad of the short pause to catch your breath. For more information on the legalities in a Humanist Wedding click here.

Symbolic Gestures

A joyful couple participates in their Handfasting ceremony, symbolically binding their lives together with colorful ribbons against a scenic backdrop.

Additional symbolic ceremonies such as Handfasting, Unity Candles, Drinking from the Quaich, Sand Ceremony, or Wine Casket can add further depth and meaning. A symbolic gesture is an action that stands for something beyond its literal meaning, often conveying deeper emotions, values, or social messages. These gestures can be powerful tools of communication because they resonate on an emotional and cultural level. I can talk you through some of these if you would like further information. For more information on Drinking from the Quaich see here.

Expressions of Gratitude and Closing Words

Before we finish, we take a moment to thank everyone who made the ceremony possible. Thanking people who were important in the ceremony is appropriate here but if you are having speeches later in the day, there is no need to thank people twice.

As the ceremony draws to a close, I offer final words, sending you both  off into the world with joy and well-wishes. Music plays, as you, the newlyweds leave the space together, hand in hand, and wait to greet your guests.

Conclusion

A humanist wedding ceremony is a beautiful tapestry woven with love, personal stories, and meaningful rituals. It's an honour to be part of such a special day, celebrating the essence of what it means to be human.

Until next time…

Cheers to love!

Sarah, Your Humanist Celebrant

And there you have it—a glimpse into a humanist wedding ceremony that embraces the beauty of love and human connection. If you have any thoughts or stories to share, feel free to leave a comment below!